I CAN'T GET CAUGHT UP

Six years ago, we were, many of us, reeling at having witnessed what a jury would come to call *the murder of George Floyd.*

Many of us - but not all - saw in the murder of Mr. Floyd a signifier of a work begun but still left wildly unperfected. Some looked right at it; let it wash over them; others looked away.

A few — but loud as hell — welcomed that extrajudicial killing as street justice, and so drifted farther from the golden shore.

Into the strong currents of those days — and *for* these days ... to echo here and now — John Polite wrote this lament.... 

I can’t get caught up in my hurt that so many don’t even make the effort to sympathize with what black folks go through. They turn their backs to the racism and racial terror that exists the same way one of the police officers kept his back to George Floyd. He’ll probably use that as a defense (IF this ever goes to trial.) “I never touched him so I’m not guilty.” Friends, racism works the same way. Turning your back to it is just as destructive and makes us just as guilty as those who actively engage in it. It’s not surprising. But it hurts nonetheless.

I can’t get caught up when some people seem to be more outraged over the destruction of property than the brazen, deliberate taking of a mans life by those assigned to protect and serve. I agree that it is counterproductive. But your silence on the murder that triggered it is deafeningly loud.

I can’t get caught up in those who view #blacklivesmatter as a profane thing and divisive, when they know perfectly well its not always affiliated with the organization of the same name and it certainly doesn’t mean black lives matter more than others. To the contrary, America needs to finally recognize that black lives are not regarded as highly as many others. Some still view us as 3/5 of a person—an assertion that was used to justify slavery. A great segment of America doesn’t believe that black lives matter. I am convinced Mr Floyd, Mr Aubrey and Ms Taylor would be alive today if they were white.

I can’t get caught up by my non black friends, some who I’ve known for decades, that I went to school and church with, broken bread with, prayed with, who not only don’t try to understand, but verbally assault those who call out racism and white supremacy, yet who have “lots of black friends.” That apparently they have not once thought “this could happen to (insert black friend here).” If you’re a friend, try, at some level, to hear us and understand.

I can’t get caught up in those who insist all whites are devils when I see too many of them strongly speaking out against racism (some of them even more than I.) While I don’t believe they can begin to understand what it’s like to be black any more than I can understand what it’s like to be white, I won’t disregard those who are truly trying, who have reached out to me personally asking “what can I do,” and who have been a part of the battle for years. It’s a disservice to white abolitionists, to the john browns, the jane Elliot's and others. we must give credit to those who make the effort.

I can’t get caught up, because ultimately it will make me as hateful as those who hate me. And I don’t have time for it. It would be an insult to my parents—who have seen racism far worse than I’ve seen—yet taught me to love one another as Jesus loved me. It would deny the fact that my family was embraced by the first baptist church of riverside when we were the first and for years the only black family to join. That they ordained both me and my mother (who served on their staff for more than 20 years.) That they packed that church at my dads funeral, and still weekly visit and bring meals to the house three months after his passing.

I can’t get caught up in the hate. God has shown me too much love in spite of the racism and hatred that pervades American culture. “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” - Dr King

— John Polite . May 29 2020