Saturday, March 10, 2018

Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers (and friends)

I keep seeing social media posts from youth workers who need help fast. They just took a call from a parent or teenager looking for help in a crisis....
Ahh! I have a parent coming to meet me in an hour — her daughter was molested ... they need help now ... what do I do!!!
 It turns out that's a bad time to recommend a book — or even a chapter in a book. The clock is ticking ... the right amount of help right now is more valuable than a crisis master class next weekend.

In response, I've launched a collection of Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers — one-page downloads that cover

— what to look for

— what to ask about

— what to do first

— what to do going forward

At present, about half the Crisis HelpSheets are free — three weeks after the mass murder in Parkland, in I'm not going to charge you for a HelpSheet on how to talk with someone you believe may be a threat to himself or others....

The HelpSheets that aren't free are just $2.

- If you're a youth worker, help yourself at

- If you have a friend in youth work, send her on over.

- If you follow a social network of people who care for teenagers please let them know about the Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers.


Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Rage | A New Crisis HelpSheet for Youth Workers

Rage | A New Crisis HelpSheet for Youth Workers

Kids don’t usually get in trouble for being angry, frustrated, or afraid. 
Kids get in trouble when they break people’s stuff.
They get in trouble for making public threats.

They get in trouble when they hurt people, animals, and themselves.
Kids get in trouble when they rage.
Rage is uncontrolled fury, expressed in lashing out, violence, destruction, or self-harm. 
A new one-page Crisis HelpSheet for Youth Workers can help you figure out what to do when a kid rages. It’s part of a collection from Jim Hancock + that includes free and low-cost Crisis HelpSheets on...
….with more in the pipeline, coming soon.

Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers aren’t everything — they’re not, for example, legal or medical advice, or counseling manuals. What they are, is an answer to the question, "What do I say to the parent who's bringing her kid to talk with me this afternoon about bullying, self-harm, sexual abuse, suicide…."

Rage is the newest Crisis HelpSheet for Youth Workers. Drop by thetinycompanycalledme and pick up your copy — or send a youth worker friend who could use some help figuring out what to do when people are in a tough spot.


Jim Hancock

PS: Stay tuned for more Crisis HelpSheets in the months ahead.... 

Tuesday, January 09, 2018

Free on January 9th + 10th | Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers

Free for Two Days: Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers

I’ve been giving away a bit of free stuff, because I can … + because my problem is not piracy, my problem is obscurity (h/t Cory Doctorow).

A dozen years ago, Rich Van Pelt + I literally wrote the book on youth workers helping teenagers in crisis. It's called  The Youth Worker’s Guide to Helping Teenagers in Crisis. It’s still available at Amazon + Zondervan.

What’s been missing is quick reference guides — one-pagers — on what to do when a teenager has been sexually abused … or bullied … or hazed … or neglected … or….

So, reflecting new experiences + ongoing research in crisis response, I’m rolling out a line of Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers at

So far, there are 10 Crisis HelpSheets.
1. Asking Good Questions
2. Bullying
3. Confidentiality
4. Cutting + Self-Harm
5. Hazing
6. Sexual Abuse
7. Referral | Getting Professional Help
8. Reporting Abuse + Neglect
9. Suicide + Homicide Threat
10. Traumatic Events
Look for more in the pipeline in the months ahead.

For the record: Crisis HelpSheets for Youth Workers offer good-faith practices based on four decades of engagement with youth workers, teenagers + families in crisis — plus a lot of work to stay current on the research. I don’t offer medical or legal advice — I am not licensed in either field.

Feel free to invite your friends in youth work to help themselves, too.
PS: Stay tuned for more Crisis HelpSheets in the months ahead.... 

Friday, January 05, 2018

Free for One Day | Under the Moon + Stars [feat. Mark Yaconelli] | Jan 05, 2018

Free for One Day: Under the Moon + Stars [feat. Mark Yaconelli]

I'm giving away a some free stuff this week, because I can … and because my problem is not piracy, my problem is obscurity (h/t Cory Doctorow).

Mark Yaconelli is one of the best storytellers I know.
Under the Moon + Stars is a story Mark told one afternoon while we were talking about the sort of people who help other people grow up. If the wind is favorable, that help comes when we’re kids. If not, it comes later, when our paths cross with people like Mark. 

This little movie is about listening to people, and encouraging folks to listen to their own lives for clues about where they might go in light of where they’ve been.

If you’re a teacher, a preacher, a youth worker, or a parent, you can use this short film to 
  • illustrate a talk or lesson
  • start a conversation in a small group
  • engage the group that gathers around your kitchen table.

Feel free to invite your neighbors, friends + other loved ones.

Happy New Year, 

Jim Hancock 

PS: January 06, the price reverts to $5.99.

PPS: Stay tuned for a little more free stuff soon.... 

Monday, January 01, 2018

Free for One Day | 10 Things We Should Never Say to Kids | January 02, 2018

I'm giving away a some free stuff this week, because I can … and because my problem is not piracy, my problem is obscurity (h/t Cory Doctorow).

The Free stuff on January 02, 2018 is a copy of 10 Things We Should Never Say to Kids.

Here are the 10 Things We Should Never Say to Kids:
1. Do You Have Your Jacket-Homework-Gym-Bag-Back-Pack-Ticket-Keys?
2. What Were You Thinking!
3. Because I Said So.
4. You Are Such a Pretty Little Thing.
5. I’m Proud of You!
6. You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To.
7. Let Me Tell You What Happened Here.
8. That’s Not How You Do It!
9. Don’t Make Me Turn This Car Around.
10. I Give Up.
Are these the absolute worst things we can say to a child? Of course not. What qualifies these 10 things for my list is:
1st — kids hear these things all the time 
2nd — these things drive kids a little nuts, even if they don’t know it
Finally — these things sound plausible (+ kids don’t know better) 
This little book is about not saying those 10 things — and what to say instead
January 03, the price reverts to $5.99.
Feel free to invite your neighbors, friends + other loved ones to grab a free copy. 
Shake things up this year … start a book club … shock your children…. Happy New Year. 

Friday, November 10, 2017

No one is safe when men think + behave this way

A 32-year-old officer of the court is said to have taken a 14-year-old to a cabin, removed his pants, groped her, pressed her hand to his erect penis. Elected official says, “There’s just nothing immoral or illegal here ... Maybe just a little bit unusual” That’s an argument from privilege. 

Transparently stupid but serious as a heart attack — and what right-thinking women and men must reject and correct in government, business, entertainment, sports, law enforcement, military, education, family, and religion.

No one is safe as long as men with power think, behave, and cover for each other this way.

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Falling Down a Hole with Donald Trump

Bill Bennett, speaking of Donald Trump at the 2017 Values Voter Summit: "We are conscious of his history. We are conscious of his future. And as Oscar Wilde said, 'Just as every sinner has a future, every saint has a past.’ "

— quoted by Jessica Taylor, NPR, "After 'Choosing Donald Trump,' Is The Evangelical Church In Crisis?” [h/t Stephen Bowlby]

This is Bizzaro World. 

Bill Bennett quoting Oscar Wilde to justify the misbehavior of Donald Trump to a crowd of Evangelicals convened by Tony Perkins…. 

Can you imagine Mr. Bennett mounting a similar defense of Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama — or even semi-pro Sunday School teacher, Jimmy Carter? 

[Alice image courtesy of Teufelbeutel CC BY-SA 3.0 (, via Wikimedia Commons]

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

#Ovaries | Standing Up

As we give credit to Republican Senators Bob Corker, Jeff Flake, and John McCain — each of whom, I believe, deserves full credit — let’s first take a moment to credit Republican Senators Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski, who already showed they have the ovaries to stand against this president when that’s what it takes to stand up for people of this nation. Thank you all, Senators. May your tribe increase.

Friday, September 22, 2017

The 501(C)(3) of Christ | Hack the Ministry

A friend tells me he is intrigued by Hack the Ministry and the conversations around it. I reply: 
I’m intrigued too. 
With no disrespect to my friends with jobs provided by some instance of the church, I, and a growing number of friends and acquaintances scattered over the earth, are finding greater success connecting with “Nones” now that we think of ourselves as some version of “Dones”.  
It doesn’t take much sociological or spiritual imagination to see that — in many places — the way we’ve been doing church is ending (or at the very least trending) badly and has been for a long time. I saw it when I still took my paycheck from a church. I think most people do; and this is the drive behind some brilliant innovation and passionate outreach and service generated by church leaders. It’s also what drives programs that looked much better on paper than in practice. 
As outreaching and open as I was — you can ask anyone  = - )  — I had to give up my church business card before I began to grasp this. On reflection, this should be no surprise. As Sinclair Lewis used to say, "It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends upon his not understanding it”.  
Years later, when I became available to friends and neighbors on Sunday mornings, I found they became available to me pretty much any time. It’s as if my getting a car and “going to church” was a barrier to entry for engagement with some of the most spiritually open-and-interested people in my community — not to mention some of my most religiously suspicious, damaged, and abused friends and neighbors. The absence any power differential makes every conversation straight across. My surrender of religious authority made way for a sober assessment of spiritual authenticity. The stories I tell about my life, alongside my daily spiritual practices, stand or fall on their own… they ring true, or not… stories and practices reinforce each other, or they don’t. 
Clearly, I’m not alone in this. And without suggesting that anyone should stop going to church, or leave their job in the church, or disavow church; I do mean to be clear that there is a life of engaged Christian practice outside the norms and structures of the 501(C)(3) of Christ. 
All this is wrapped up, for me, in this conversation about hacking the ministry. And I find myself feeling real anticipation about what others bring to the table — to correct, affirm, recalibrate, or help me reimagine what I’ve been thinking and doing.

Wherever you are on the continuum, If you’re intrigued too, I hope you’ll take the day to be with us in Seattle for Hack the Ministry 

— it’s Thursday, October 12, 2017 

— we’ll gather from 10 am to 10 pm at Ballard Homestead 

tickets are $49 — or you can bring two friends, at a total cost of $99 for the three of you — lunch and dinner are included

— out-of-towners seem to be leaning toward Hampton Inn and Suites, Northgate

Selective Outrage | Selective Grace

I keep wondering what churches would be like if they were as gracious - and patient - with everyone as they are with the greedy.